britty books

This will be the last Bullying Prevention contribution book review for a little while as I’m moving back to my hometown of Regina, Saskatchewan, Canada.  I’m come to realize that it takes a trained eye to recognize the beauty of a desolate prairie landscape and my eye has been already trained.  In the meantime, please note other Bullying Prevention book reviews here on the site, or take some time to sign up for my good friend, J. Richard Knapp’s Bullying Prevention International Newsletter that comes delivered straight to your inbox at the top of each month.  We’ll see you soon in the Land of the Living Skies!

A Bully with a Background:  Gregory Maguire’s Take in
Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West

To the grim poor there need be no pour quoi tale about where evil arises; it just arises; it always is.  One never learns about how the witch became wicked, or whether that was the right choice for her – is it ever the right choice?  Does the devil ever struggle to be good again, or if si is he not a devil?  It is at the very least a question of definitions. ~page 298, Wicked

Some people may be familiar with this book because of the Tony award-winning musical, Wicked, featuring Idina Menzel and Kristin Chenoweth.  The musical’s storyline follows the general premise of the book:  we, the reader, discover the background history of green-skinned Elphaba, the Wicked Witch of the West who lives in the land of Oz made famous by Frank L. Baum.

Elphie, as her friends know her, is born to a minister and his promiscuous wife.  It is implied that neither she nor her sister, NessaRose the eventual eastern menace, are blood children of their father.  Elphie doesn’t speak she is nearly five, whereupon her first word is ‘horrors.’  She is shunned from her mother, who can’t get past her odd manner and her green skin.  Her father is primarily absent.  Some respite comes when Nanny takes it upon herself to social Elphie with the other children, who promptly take to throwing rocks at her.

Skip to twelve years later and Elphie meets her roommate, Galinda, at boarding school.  You may have guessed already, but this Galinda eventually drops the ‘a’ and becomes Glinda, the person we know as the Good Witch of the North.  Of course, things get off to a rocky start as Galinda cares more about the social set than her moody, scholarly roomie, but as time goes by the two become good, if not great, friends.  Elphaba encourages Galinda to use her brain more instead of acting stupid to impress people.  Galinda drops the ‘a’ when she joins Elphie’s cause to discover why the talking Animals are disappearing from Oz (non-speaking animals are not represented with the formal ‘Animal’ term).  Political pressure reigns down from the top dog in the land, the Wizard of Oz.

Another five years pass and a chum from the boys’ school, Fiyero, finds Elphaba in hiding as she is a member of an underground movement to save the Animals.  Fiyero and Elphie start an affair, which leaves Elphie pregnant with a son, Liir.  More is written about him in Macguire’s sequel, Son of a Witch. After a botched attempt by the authorities trying to capture Elphaba, it is believed Fiyero is dead.  Elphaba travels to his homeland to make penance with his wife and discovers Chistery, who later becomes the leader of her flying monkey squadron.  Life continues to go downhill for Elphie from here…and Dorothy hasn’t even appeared yet!

Maguire’s view is both dark and unique as a peek behind the curtain at the person before she became the Witch.  He poses a good question:  are bad people born or made?  Are bullies only a result of their environment?  Is it the responsibility of everyone to maintain a social normal, or do we encourage out-of-the-box ideas and seek to understand them?

The Wicked Witch certainly is a sympathetic character in Macguire’s point of view.  Socially awkward, she only tries to improve the destiny of those she sees as oppressed by the system using radical measures.  In return, the system makes her an outcast.  Glinda, on the other hand, falls into conformity, married well and is sainted.

If being bullied, it is difficult to want to stop and examine why the bully is acting the way they do but it may be worth it.  A bully’s background may provide a key to why they act the way they do and, given this key, you may discover a way to reverse or correct their past.  Asking questions of a bully in calmer moments may lead to common understanding and deeper insight.  Maybe your bully only wants a sympathetic ear or someone to pay attention to them.  Maybe they want someone to take seriously what they have to say.  Given the circumstances, it is most likely your bully doesn’t have the tools to communicate properly and is given to bullying as a method of being.  Pick your moment and try being a try friendship as a viable option.  Your may be pleasantly surprised!

One last note on Wicked, the book: as opposed to the musical, this is a book intended for an adult audience and includes dark and sexual themes.  It is not recommended reading for children or teens.

You may be a bully simply be being silent. Really.

This month’s book  for the Bullying Prevention Newsletter is something more for the youngsters…not that I didn’t get a whole lot out of it.  I did!  Sadly, as a victim survivor of childhood bullying, I recognize places where I might have changed the outcome in certain situations.  I told my own mother about the lessons I learned from reading this book and she congratulated me on my efforts.  She related a part of a story about my being bullied that I had never heard before.  Having arrived home from school with spit all over of the back of my coat from having bullies pick on me, she phoned the principal and threatened to have me removed and then go to the media about it.  I told my mother I didn’t remember the spitting incident at all (or barely.  I’m blessed with a short memory).  We ended up having a really good discussion about growing up in the neighbourhood in which we lived.  This book was a great segue to having this conversation!

If you need some resources or doorways to start a conversation about bullying with your children, sign up for J. Richard Knapp’s International Bullying Prevention Newsletter. It comes once a month to your inbox and is a great reminder to keep the lines of communication open – as well as getting these awesome book reviews!  On to the review:

Strategies for Thwarting, Coping
and Changing Behaviors for the Better
in Confessions of a Former Bully

Confession of a Former Bully may not exactly line up with the teen to adult fiction reviewed for the International Bullying Prevention letter to date.  This book, written by Trudy Ludwig and illustrated by Beth Adams, was published in 2010 for the benefit of children grades three to six.  I, however, learned lots of new things and really enjoyed the statistics and hand-drawn illustrations.

Ludwig confesses she was a former bully and writes this book from her own perspective at the time the bullying occurred.  She admits that she didn’t realize that simply saying mean things or even ignoring people could be bullying – she thought that bullying meant physically fighting.

There is a lot of self-realization as the fictionalized young Ludwig comes to terms with how she acted and what measures can be done to correct her wrongs.  What I found most fascinating was her list of tools when reacting to a bully.  Here they are:

1.    Say, “Stop!” Remember to look the bully in the eye and act confident.
2.    Ask, “Why?” after every sentence the bully throws at you.
3. Walk Away.
4.    Say, “So?,” “Whatever,” and “Who cares?” in a neutral voice.
5. Change the subject.
6.    Act silly or goofy.
7. Turn an insult into a compliment.
8.    Agree…but only if you’re comfortable with doing so.  Don’t use this tactic more than once.

Of course, if you are being physically bullied seek help. If you are a victim of cyber-bullying, do not respond. Instead, print or copy the offensive material and seek out someone who can help protect you, like a parent or teacher.

Some startling statistics Ludwig refers to:

• 80% of elementary school bullying on the playground is witnessed by an audience.
• When a by-stander intervenes in a bullying episode they are successful in ending it half of the time.
• Every day 160,000 kids miss school because of bullying.
• Most cyber-bullying occurs between 8 and 14 years of age.
• Kids find emotional bullying more harmful than physical bullying.

Are you as shocked as I am by this?  Being a victim of not one, but two, broken noses at the hands of bullies, I would have to agree that the emotional side of bullying is far more impactful.

I recommend this book as a wonderful addition to any elementary school library or as a discussion starter between parents and their kids.  Beyond coping for current victims of bullying, this book will help you be proactive in not becoming a bully or a by-stander.  Included are many website resources in the appendix.  In a sidebar, Ludwig mentions a quote from Dr. Seuss:

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose.”

Empower yourself and your children to stop the bully machine today!

When you're lost, you can't get any loster.

This is my second newsletter article/book review with Bullying Prevention by speaker and author, J. Richard Knapp.  For more information on bullying prevention or to sign up for the monthly newsletter, see his website for details. Click here to look at a review from last month on Flowers for Algernon. Happy reading!

Survival of the Cruelest: Bean’s Manipulation of Street Bullies
In Ender’s Shadow: Orson Scott Card

“So we know that a lot of kids who should get a turn can’t even get in the line, because they’re pushed out.  And if we do manage to stop the bullies and let one of the little ones in, then they get beaten up afterward.  We never see them again.  It’s ugly.”
“Survival of the fittest.”
“Of the cruelest….”  ~page 20, Ender’s Shadow

The Ender’s series of books by author Orson Scott Card may be some of the best science fiction you’ve never tried.   Ender’s Game written in 1985 zoomed to the tops of best-selling fiction lists.  This story featured a brilliant boy named Ender who goes to Battle School to save the earth from an invasion of the Formics (also known as Buggers).  Ender receives a good dose of bullying, both from his brother while on earth and from fellow Battle School students in space.  How he deals with their aggressive and manipulative behavior is at times shocking (i.e. he kills another student in self defense.) but always interesting.

Ten years after the release of Ender’s Game, Orson Scott Card decided to try his hand at writing a companion novel called Ender’s Shadow that would follow another character during the same time period.  Bean is that character.  And, as with Ender, Bean has a lion’s share of bullies in his life.

Bean grows up on the streets of Rotterdam somewhere in the world’s not-to-distant future.  At four years of age his powers of observation are far superior to an average man’s.  He studies how social interaction works to people’s advantage and disadvantage.  He decides to enter into a ‘family,’ or gang, of children scavenging for food.  Quickly, he informs the current leader, Poke, that she needs to recruit an older, tougher bully to work for them and protect them.  The family, by force, coerces a lame boy named Achilles to be their ‘papa.’

Because [Poke] had picked, not just the weakest bully, the easiest to beat, but also the smartest, the one that understood how to win and hold the loyalty of others.  All Achilles had ever needed was the chance.  ~page 38, Ender’s Shadow

Under Bean’s strategic plan, Achilles flips the soup line politics on its head and smaller children are able eat instead of spending their days foraging for food.  The older bullies gather their own ‘families’ and it seems like civilization returns to the streets.  However, Achilles has a long memory and the willingness to wait.  He remembers how Bean, a four-year-old small for his age, once had power over him, a bully.  Bean knows he must escape Achilles before the bully can exact his revenge…

Both Ender’s Shadow and Ender’s Game are highly recommended reading for anyone who has ever felt small.  Although Bean and Ender both take extreme measures against their bullies; they cannot be faulted for cowering.  Is their confidence in the face of danger reckless or the smartest course of action?

As Charlie Gordon's intelligence increases, his memories of being bullied also return.

The great thing about Twitter is the accessibility to authors all over the world.  Recently, it was my privilege to speak with J. Richard Knapp (@jrichardknapp) about the possibility of reviewing his recent novel.  He agreed, so be on the lookout for that review coming soon.  But, as creative types are wont to be, he realized an opportunity to make it a win-win for both of us.  He asked me to be a monthly contributor to his newsletter on Bullying Prevention by providing book reviews.  Hooray!  So, below is my first article for his September newsletter.  Subscribe here to the newsletter to find out more about prevention for adults and children.

Charlie, Charlie, Fat-Head Barley:
A Book Review on Bullying in Keyes’ Flowers for Algernon

Flowers for Algernon by author Daniel Keyes was required reading for every grade nine student at Thom Collegiate High School in Regina, Saskatchewan.  And, like the other students, I railed and complained against having to read this book.  Or any book for that matter.  The teacher was the enemy and we, the students, were united in our dislike of homework.  Of course, being the diligent reader I am, I secretly read ahead of the class and stayed up late at night, excited to see what would happen next.

Children circle around him laughing and teasing him like little dogs snapping at his feet.  Charlie smiles at them.  He would like to put down his bundle and play games with them, but when he thinks about it the skin on his back twitches and he feels the way the older boys throw things at him.
-Flowers for Algernon, page 32

In this near-day science fiction, diary-style novel, Charlie Gordon is a legally retarded man who undergoes an operation to increase his intelligence.  As his intellect grows, his ability to recollect childhood memories grows, too.  As the passage indicates, Charlie is bullied by neighborhood children for being slow and then later on the same page, bullied by his co-workers for sleeping on the job.  His distrust and suspicion of others is a common theme throughout the rest of the novel stemming from these early incidences of aggression and isolation.

When children or adults get together and present a united front, they can change opinion.  At Thom Collegiate High School, the students often changed the teacher’s opinion about the due date of the Flowers for Algernon homework sheets.  It went like this: one person complained and everyone stood behind them in silent agreement.

Look for this book review in Bullying Prevention September newsletter.

For Charlie Gordon, one person bullies him and his co-workers stand in silent agreement while Charlie’s humiliation mounts.  As Charlie’s intelligence increases, he realizes how ill-treated he was…but it still continues to haunt him.  He returns to his former workplace seeking understanding but finding only confusion.  The effects of bullying on Charlie Gordon are some of his earliest recovered memories and certainly the last to fade.  Daniel Keyes keenly portrays how cruel people of all ages can be to “outcasts.”

This novel is a quick read and a good study on the long-term effects of bullying on self-image.  Even through perceived success, Charlie fails to make amends with the bullies of his past.  In real life, atonement is possible to achieve.  How would you rewrite this ending for Charlie?